7 Tips for Men from Women

by Earnie

1.  Talking Solves Problems: First thing to realize is that men and woman may approach problem solving problem differently.  She may work through the problem by simply talking about it.  She does not want you to fix it unless she asks you to solve it.  All she needs is for you to listen and empathize with her in order to support her through the process. 

2.  Face to Face: Understand that women are different from men when it comes to spending time together.  Men can sit side by side and say nothing for a good time together like when they are fishing.  Women need to be face to face and talking in order to feel connected with you.  Focus on looking her in the eyes when talking with her and give her you undivided attention.  Make sure she knows you hear what she is saying and how she feels about it – not your thoughts or feelings or your way to fix it!

3.  Leadership: When a woman takes the lead in a situation, she may be feeling like the man doesn’t have control of a situation.  I’m not talking about the regular daily chores you have divided up between you two.  She needs you to take the lead and do it lovingly, gently, and selflessly. Recognize that she may have valuable input into the situation, but it is your job to be the leader and not be passive.   Remember to lead the way you want to be leadDo not exacerbate her or your children.  Become a Servant leader.  To lead well you need to lead by the Holy Spirit.

4.  Providing: She wants to feel that you will take care of her, and wants to be on an adventure with you.  In her heart, she wants you to be the guy in the story sweeping her up on to your white horse to your great adventure.  From a biblical point of view, the scripture says that: “Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.” (1 Tim 5:8)

5.  Protecting: A woman’s greatest need is to feel protected.  In order to create a living space that  will allow your wife to be who she was created to be, you need to make sure she feels safe in any situation and that you will protect her.  God did not create women to be as strong as a man so they look to the man to be the strength and courage in a situation.  Scripture says: “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” (1 Peter 3.7)

6.  Loving: Everyone has a Love language.  According to Gary Chapman the languages are Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.  You will only have one or maybe two primary love languages.  For example, if her love language is Words of Affirmation and you do chores around the house and buy her gifts all the time, she will not feel loved by you.  You need to focus on her love language(s) because that is what actually touches her heart the way she and you want it touched.  Here is a link for you both to find out what your love languages are.  (http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/)  (Click Myself at the bottom.)

7.  Sex and Intimacy:  Guys, if you approach your wife more like cooking a wonderfully flavorful meal in a slow cooking Crockpot, you will discover more power in your sexual encounter with her.  Start in the morning and raise her sexual temperature and expectation into the evening.  Read the details of how this works in our article at the following link.    (https://novanimus.com/2012/08/29/crock-pot-sex-game-plan/)

 

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