Have you heard of the 5 Languages of Apology?
According to Gary Chapman who wrote the book if we had a perfect world there would be no need for apologies, but in our daily lives, we cannot live without them.
The need for apologies influences all human relationships and can start the restoration process when a relationship has been fractured.
However, as Gary Chapman has discovered we each have our own apology language and sincere apologies are not always received as being sincere because we do not hear it in our own language.
Here are the 5 different languages and I would encourage you to determine what your spouses is so you can speak their language when saying you are sorry. Click here to learn more:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-the-languages/the-five-languages-of-apology/
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Expressing Regret “I am sorry”
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Excepting Responsibility “ I was wrong”
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Making Restitution “What can I do to make it right?”
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Genuinely Repenting “ I’ll try not to do that again”
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Requesting Forgiveness “Will you please forgive me?”
So many times our hearts are wrenched by a problem we have or someone else’s needs or behaviors that we a concerned about. Our situation or theirs has motivated us to think a lot about it and driven us to do all we can to manage the situation. But even with all our efforts and actions, it is still beyond our control to have it change to the place we want it to be.
The best thing we can do at this point is to let it go but that means it is out of control with no hope for a solution. That is why people now say “let go and let God” deal with the situation. If we let go and let God get involved, we then have hope for success from our perspective. It gives us the opportunity to believe that God can go where we can’t and speak to the situation or people involved in a way we can’t.
When we do what we can and give it to God to work on, we can finally have hope, feel that wonderful peace that comes which surpasses understanding in the midst of crisis, and let God determine His solution to this problem in our lives. The bible says “..seek God’s peace and pursue it….” Psalm 34:14.
I know that I personally have trouble dealing with crisis situations in my life when I “give it to God” and then try to pick it back up again to fix it! As soon as I unknowingly take the control back from God I immediately lose that peace that only comes from giving the problem to God! So when crisis hits in my life I constantly evaluate what I can do to help and then focus on finding and maintaining peace in the situation.
I was listening to a podcast by Joyce Meyer and she said something that caught my attention – “Love is not a mere feeling; it is a decision about how we will behave and treat people.” So often, I have heard people say I just do not know if I love them anymore. If what Joyce says is true then it is not how I feel about a person that is what love is, but how I treat them. When I choose to be patient, kind, not proud or rude but trusting and hopeful I love that person.
If love were just an emotion, God would not have commanded us to do it. You cannot just demand someone have an emotion. I cannot tell you to be happy; it is not something you can do on cue. Love being a decision we make to behave in a certain way gives me hope. I can always choose to change my attitude to love someone. By showing him or her patience, kindness, hope and trust, I am displaying my love.
What are some other implications if love is not a feeling, but a choice we make?
